Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Powerful Communication 2

What makes me (and Carl Jung) think that control over our feelings and emotions is desirable? Does control not mean suppression? Does it mean that we become unemotional and cold?
I said in a previous blog that our actions and reactions are governed by our feelings. We don't do what we need to do, but what we want to do. Acting according to our feelings is sometimes not the wisest thing to do. Reacting according to our feelings can be sometimes stupid or even self-destructive. Think of my example in a previous post of the sectretary and her boss. When it comes to serious decisions,actions and reactions I always advize to say to yourself STOP! STEP BACK! EVALUATE! and then do just that. Use your cognitive skills and think quickly if what you are about to do is the best thing for you to do. It does not need to take a long period of time. In most cases a second or two are good enough. Good enough to at least delay what you want to do for a further few seconds. Evaluate and think what course of action would be a better one. And then make your decision based on your intellect, your logic and your reason.
Control does not mean suppression, it means to exchange useless feelings that hinder you against useful feelings that put you in a resourceful state of mind, that encourage and empower you. The operative word is exchange.
When we exchange negative feelings for positive ones, we display the good ones emotionally. And we really feel these emotions, they are perfectly natural even though we have created them. But we create our feelings anyway. Remember, it is not events and experiences that create our feelings, but our interpretation of the events and experiences. We can at will make up our interpretations. We all do it anyway. But most of us are unaware of  the fact that we do it. Now we can take complete control over this power that we quite naturally possess.
How do we go about it? By using words.
But I will talk about this next time.

Happiness Discovered by Udo Stadtsbuchler

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